Love is like a garden. The more time and effort you commit to it, the more beautiful it becomes.
—A.R. Lucas
Couples Therapy
When someone comes to therapy it is often because their concerns are starting to impact their relationships with loved ones. I specialize in helping individuals, couples, and families improve their communication, address unhelpful patterns of interactions, and strengthen their relationships. It is important to help partners understand each other's perspective, be vulnerable with each other, and find ways to compromise in order to have a healthy relationship. At times, working with couples can also involve addressing each partner's needs in separate sessions in order to be better equipped at addressing collective concerns.
Attachment Styles
Learning more about your attachment style and relationship patterns can be incredibly helpful for developing and maintaining fulfilling relationships. We typically develop our attachment styles with our primary caregivers, and it takes time and dedication to move to a secure sense of attachment if this is something that was not developed with early attachment figures. Working with me as your therapist can provide a microcosm for what a secure attachment is like in order to expand this sense of security to your other relationships. The four main attachment styles include: secure, anxious (preoccupied), avoidant (dismissive), and disorganized (fearful avoidant).
Communication
As a therapist, I pay close attention to the words clients use and challenge them to get better and better at expressing themselves. It is important to be able to communicate messages effectively in order to express what you want and to be heard by those you love. It is all too common to see people avoiding important conversations or being disappointed with the results due to not having the skills needed to be more assertive or caring. I enjoy teaching these skills and providing the space needed to practice them. When applicable, I also work with couples on addressing power differentials and developing clear boundaries.
Codependency
While codependency was originally defined as a type of relationship that only existed in the context of families with substance abuse issues, it is now understood that this form of dependency applies to those without substance abuse concerns as well. The typical dynamic in a codependent relationship is with someone who rescues and someone who needs rescuing. This can take many forms, some of which include: taking care of others to the detriment of their own needs, always needing to be in a relationship, trouble being alone, attracting “needy” friends and partners, losing your sense of self in the service of others, hyper focused on other’s concerns, feeling a need to be needed by others, etc. Ultimately codependency can lead to a compromised development of one’s identity as an individual due to being overly interconnected with others.